Theology of the Heart: Our Lived Out Beliefs
Discover Your Core Beliefs: A Path to Healing
Have you ever wondered why you keep repeating patterns that don’t align with your faith — As Paul says in Romans 7:15-20 we keep doing what you don’t want and not doing what you do want to do?
This indicates that there is something else driving our behaviors other than our will power alone. It indicates that there are spiritual powers and principalities at play in our lives directing our steps.
But what is at the root of why we do what we do? There is obviously a spiritual element to this but at some point the spiritual must begin to take shape in our brains, bodies, and actions. This is the place where I will begin.
Our experiences, particularly early in life, and our reaction to those experiences form our core beliefs. These beliefs are often at such a deep level that they form our identity or the way we see ourselves. Our identity informs our worldview and our worldview form our reactions and defense.
Key experiences—> Identity and social identity —> World view and perspective—> Reactions and defenses—> How we live, feel, and relate.
Let’s reflect together on how your core beliefs shape your story — and how God can rewrite it.
How Core Beliefs Are Formed
Core beliefs are shaped by the experiences growing up. We come to key conclusion about who we are, how the world works and who God is. These core beliefs are often not even consciously made but are the first lens see through. These beliefs carry strong bodily responses that can overpower logic and shape what we call our practical theology — the way we actually live out what we believe.
For more on how core beliefs are formed see this article on trauma or read Francine Shapiro’s book, Getting Past Your Past.
Foundational Core Belief Questions
Every person develops core beliefs shaped by fundamental human needs. These questions often form the foundation of who we believe ourselves to be and create the lived out theology of our hearts. :
Am I safe?
Am I guilty or to blame?
Do I belong? Am I loved?
Am I enough? Do I have what it takes?
These beliefs are often expressed in short, childlike phrases that bypass our mental defenses and go straight to the heart.
Common Core Belief Examples
Safety
“Something bad is going to happen.”
“I’m weak and helpless.”
“If I don’t hold it together, everything will fall apart.”
Guilt / Blame
“It’s all my fault.”
“I should have done something.”
“I’m a bad person”
“I don’t deserve happiness.”
Belonging / Love
“I’m unlovable.”
“I’m different/ broken”
“You’d be better off without me.”
“I have to be perfect to be loved.”
“If you really knew me you’d leave”
“My voice doesn’t matter, I’m insignificant”
“I will always be alone”
Enough / Adequacy
“I’m not good enough.”
“I’m a failure.”
“I’ll never measure up.”
“I’m worthless””
“I’m a fraud/ imposter syndrome”
These core beliefs often mirror stories we lived in at particular times in our lives. We continue to live out of these “scripts” until we revisit and re-story them—reprocessing old beliefs through God’s truth and our mature understanding as adults.
Five Ways Core Beliefs Show Up in Our Lives
Our Hearts – This is where our practical “DNA” resides. What do you believe about your identity and your deepest desires? See the 6 questions we ask at the heart level.
Our Motivations – Are you driven by love and belonging, or by fear and shame?
Our Defenses – Do you perform, hide, or avoid hard things to cover feelings of inadequacy? Defenses often surface strongest during conflict or crisis.
Our Choices and Lifestyles – Do you numb emotional pain through busyness, work, screens, or substances? Do you avoid vulnerability because others feel unsafe?
Our Emotions – Do your emotions align more with Biblical truth or your early childhood core beliefs?
The Tree Analogy
Core beliefs function like a tree:
Seed – The belief is planted in our hearts.
Roots – We draws in from motivation from fear and shame, or from love and devotion.
Bark and Thorns – Our defenses form to protect us from further pain.
Growth/ Branches – What’s drawn up from the roots shapes the kind of growth we produce. The branches follow instructions in the DNA.
Leaves – Just as leaves change with the seasons, our emotions come and go — yet they reflect what’s happening at a deeper level.
Example Story: Rejection
Seed – When Emma was in middle school, her best friend suddenly stopped talking to her. The belief planted in Emma’s heart was, “I’m not worth staying for.” That thought quietly shaped how she saw herself.
Roots – Over time, she began to draw motivation from fear of rejection. She pushed herself to be overly helpful and agreeable so people wouldn’t leave again — her roots were tangled in shame, not love.
Bark and Thorns – To protect herself, Emma grew emotional “bark.” She learned to smile through disappointment, deflect compliments, and avoid deeper relationships. The “thorns” came out whenever someone got too close — sarcasm or withdrawal to keep others from hurting her.
Growth/Branches – Her outward growth looked like success: dependable, high-achieving, always there for others. But the kind of “fruit” she bore was exhaustion and loneliness. The branches followed the “DNA” of her early belief — to earn worth through performance.
Leaves – In counseling, Emma began to notice waves of sadness and anger — her emotional “leaves.” As they changed, she realized they weren’t random moods but reflections of her inner roots. With time, she learned to trace the emotions to the root causes and sink new roots into love and faithfulness—that her worth was intrinsic, not conditional. Her new growth felt lighter, freer, and more connected.
Moving Toward Healing and Growth
Growth begins when we become aware of our core beliefs and gently expose them to God’s truth. Healing happens as we allow Christ to reshape our inner narrative, replacing fear and shame with love and identity rooted in Him. As our beliefs shift, our motivations, defenses, and lifestyles begin to reflect the freedom and peace we were designed for.
Need help beginning your own story of transformation?
If you’d like support in exploring these questions through faith-based counseling, we’d love to walk with you.
👉 Set up an appointment here
👉 Learn more about Growth Counseling
